Looks like Aubrey will be here for awhile

I was so excited for Aubrey and Dylan to get here in February. I hate having them so far away. Although I have enjoyed every minute of it, I wish the reasons behind the extended stay were for fun and not Health issues for sweet Aub.

About 4 years ago she developed a nasal polyp which was treated with medication. The doctor said they don't remove them unless they become severe. She learned to deal with the annoyance and went on with her life.

About a year ago she started experiencing vertigo and was always somewhat dizzy. She ended up going to a doctor that specialized in dizziness. He ran quite a few tests but found no reason for her problem. When she got here, she said she thought maybe she needed glasses so we set up an appointment for her. Her vision was perfect but when they dilated her eyes the doctor saw that her optic nerve was elevated where it goes into the back of the eye. He sent her to a neuro-omphlamologist who ran more tests. There was pressure causing the problem which usually means a tumor...SCARY!! He arranged for a MRI and an appointment with a neurologist. Needless to say we were all pretty worried. We went to that appointment and this doctor was VERY good at explaining things to us "regular" folk. There was no tumor but her brain was swollen and was pushing the optic nerve into the back of her eye. He set her up for a spinal tap to try and determine the cause but thought it might be that her body produces to much spinal fluid. We go there on Wednesday to find out for sure. BUT... the MRI showed that the polyps had spread and every nasal cavity is blocked...sooooo she has to have surgery. We were sent to a ENT specialist who has put her on some medication to help shrink things up a bit so they can do a CT scan and see what needs to be done. He also is sending her to an allergist to find out what she can do so that there will be a greater chance of them not coming back....WHEW!! So that is what we have been doing for her visit... I am really hoping that we can work some actual fun time into the mix soon!!
She will have to stay probably another 2 months to get everything taken care of.

Letting Go ~

Have you ever struggled letting your adult children go? How do we do it?

My mind tells me to trust in God, but getting my heart to completely believe and trust him can be a real challenge for me.

I know in my head that I can't always keep my kids safe from physical harm, decisions they make or the worldly influences they will face. I also can't make all their dreams come true.

I know that prayer is the essential action and I do pray about this very often. I still find myself wanting to protect those I love.

I find myself feeling guilty for just about every bad decision my kids make even though I know I shouldn't. 

I am trying to trust that God will take care of them and letting him have the control. I can only love them.

How many times have your kids done something that has worried you or made you want to step in and take over?

How many times have you, in fact, interfered in their life to try to make things better, only to find that your worrying, controlling and "wise counsel" are neither wanted nor appreciated?

I have  found myself repeatedly trying to help my kids and repeatedly having my efforts rejected and repeatedly trying again and again with not much getting better and a whole lot getting worse.  Maybe it's time to try something different.

I know it doesn't mean abandoning them or loving them less or hurting them in any way. It just means finally understanding that there is only so much I can do to help them.

I came across this list of what it is to let go. This is where I'm going to try to keep my focus.

To "Let Go" does not mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else.

To "Let Go" is not to cut myself off, it's the realization I can't control another

To "Let Go" is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To "Let Go" is to admit I am powerless, which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To "Let Go" is not to try to change or blame another, it's to make the most of myself.

To "Let Go" is not to care for, but to care about.

To "Let Go" is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To "Let Go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be human.

To "Let Go" is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To "Let Go" is not to be protective, it is to permit another to face reality.

To "Let Go" is not to deny, but to accept

To "Let Go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To "Let Go" is not to adjust everything to my desires but to take each day at it comes, and cherish myself in it.

To "Let Go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To "Let Go" is to fear less and love more.



Sending Love and Light to all the parents and their children that are going through this "Letting Go" process.

A few pics of Aubrey and Dylans visit so far

How to Mend a Broken Heart

There are several people that are very close to my heart that are experiencing the ending of a relationship. My heart aches for them. I know how hard it can be. I came across this article by Susie and Otto Collins, Relationship Coaches and thought maybe it might help to get them through this rough patch.
Sending LOVE and LIGHT to you all!!


How to Mend a Broken Heart
Anyone who has gone through a breakup or divorce and has come out the other side with a broken heart, knows what we are talking about. It can be a very painful experience! One of the ways to help yourself to feel better and actually heal from a breakup or divorce is to begin to listen to what you are telling yourself. In other words, pay attention to your “self talk.”

We all talk to ourselves all of the time and this is what we call 'self talk.' These thoughts come and go in our minds and they can either help us go through life with relative ease or struggling at every step of the way.

In our experience, this 'self talk' can either keep you stuck in the past--mulling over what went wrong or what you should have done differently--or stuck in the future--worrying about what might happen at some point down the road. Or 'self talk' can help you to stay in the present moment, dealing practically with what's happening right now, and move powerfully and positively into your future.

One of the best kept secrets is that you can change your thoughts. Believe it or not, many people learn how to do it. Here are 5 ways to change 'self talk' to help you ease your pain from your breakup or divorce...

1. Become aware of what you are telling yourself.
Believe it or not, our thoughts are habits that we've created along the way. For instance, there's the "guilt" set of thoughts, the "worry" set of thoughts, the "fear" set of thoughts, the "I'm always going to be alone" set of thoughts, the "nothing's wrong" set of thoughts or the "sunny outlook" set of thoughts--you get the idea.

If you want to begin healing your pain, start paying attention to your particular set of thoughts. You might even give them a name. Maybe you've not had these thoughts until your breakup or maybe they've been with you for a long time. Whichever is the case, just begin noticing what thoughts roll through your mind.


2. Once you have become aware of your thoughts, decide which thoughts  make you feel better, easier about your situation and those that don't. Take a legal pad or notebook and at the top of the page, make 2 columns with these headings: "Feel better" and "Feel Worse." Keep the legal pad or notebook where you can easily reach it. As thoughts come to you, write them down under one of those two categories. Do this long enough for you to see on paper, your patterns of thinking that are either helping you or pulling you down.


3. Identify one reoccurring thought or pattern that is bringing you pain and make the commitment to yourself to change it. Write your commitment down and post it where you'll see it often. It could go something like this...
"I commit to changing my thoughts about how alone I am right now. I may not be with a partner right now but I don't have to constantly remind myself."


4. Choose a thought that is better. Taking our example, this thought is probably not going to be that you are completely joyful, are with your perfect partner, or feel completely satisfied with your current situation. It may be that a better thought is that when a thought comes up about how alone you are, you change that thought to "I can call Bonnie or Carol and either talk with them or arrange to go to dinner or a movie."


5. Practice in each moment and break your habit. Have you ever broken a habit? It takes being aware of what you are doing and then making a change in the moment. Your thought pattern is a habit and can be changed--but you have to believe the thought that you are changing to--and you have to practice it.


If feeling better is important to you, this is valuable information that will help you to move forward in your healing process from your breakup or divorce